As we approach the ending of summer and beginning of autumn and the fall equinox...
Transitions. Every single one of us is going through them right now. Sometimes we choose them, sometimes they are chosen for us. As human beings, we tend to fear change, and most times resisting it. We try to hold on to ideas, youth, possessions, etc. as if they were never in a state of decay since their inception.
I however like Nikki Giovanni’s perspective of transitioning. “A lot of people resist transition and therefore never allow themselves to enjoy who they are. Embrace the change, no matter what it is; once you do, you can learn about the new world you’re in and take advantage of it”. I think that one is a bit more pleasant.
If one was to take a personal inventory of their own transitions in life, we would be amazed at the ground we have covered. Our very achievements would astound us.
We learnt to walk and talk, we have felt love and sadness for the first time, we moved into what we thought was independence in our teen years, realizing that it was not just yet, true independence. Some of us have dated, married, became parents and have said goodbye to our own parents and friends. Are living through a world pandemic and perhaps living or supporting someone with a cancer diagnosis.
Many of these transitions were terrifying to us at the time, but they are what have taken us to this very point at which we rest right now. Lao Tzu said, “If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading”.
Our brains are hard wired to resist change. This instinctive practice goes back to our primitive days where we required stasis, or maintenance of the status quo in order to maintain survival. We needed to know where the hunting grounds were, the closest watering hole, where danger lurked. That was survival during primitive times for humankind.
There is no doubt that we have seen more change and had to transition more in the last 100 years than we had to in the last 1000. ONLY 100 years ago we were using a horse and buggy for transportation, women first got the vote, and life expectancy for humans was 53-54 years.
Here is my message; when we see the immeasurable number of changes we have transitioned through, with true reflection, we do not fear it so much. We were successful. We recognize that change and the need to transition through it is not only necessary, but we have been doing it all our lives. Welcome the next turn, dip or drop because the only thing in life that is a true constant, is that of change.
Though we cannot always choose our circumstances, we can choose how we deal with them. We can be victims of circumstance and give away our personal power or we can make the best of the hand we are dealt and steer the course of our lives.
May you welcome the changes and seasons of your life as they arrive greeting each a guest in your home.
Cancer Care Counsellor