Preventing Holiday-Related Caregiver Burnout

As we head into this holiday season, it is important for caregivers to ask for and accept help. Not asking for help can cause caregivers to withdraw and avoid celebrating the holidays altogether.  In fact, studies have shown that four in ten caregivers say they can’t manage it all during the holidays.  However, caregivers deserve to celebrate the holidays, too, time to relax, and time to enjoy family and friends.

Even if you don’t normally do so, the holidays are a great time to get some extra help — even a few hours can be a huge relief. Family and friends can help with holiday preparations, and you can start simply by asking a relative or friend to pick up a few gifts while they are doing their own shopping,  or to check in on your loved one every so often through a phone call or virtual visit

Five Helpful Tips to Alleviate Caregiver Stress This Season:

1. Adapt How You Host: While tradition might have had you hosting a formal sit-down holiday dinner. This year will be asking us to modify and have a smaller family gatherings due to the pandemic; this can allow for creating a simpler perhaps more intimate holiday experience together
2. Gift-Giving Simplified: Gift-giving is a huge part of the holidays but can be costly and time-consuming. Try shopping online or enlist a friend or relative to do some of your shopping locally and wrapping for you. Gift cards are also very popular and a very low-stress way to show people you care.
3. Set Reasonable Goals:   Do only what you can reasonably manage, in light of the fact that caregiving is an enormous responsibility. It is OK to say “no” to requests that you just cannot fulfill this time of year. No one will think less of you.
4. Be Flexible: Accept that some of your holiday traditions may need to change given your loved one’s needs, and your care taking role. 
5. Create New Traditions:  Lowering holiday stresses can often be aided by creating new traditions to replace ones that just don’t work for your family situation any longer. For example, you might start a new tradition of watching old home movies or family photos albums to look at together on Christmas Eve or Hanukkah.

 How Can You Have Your Best Holiday Season Together?

One of the most important points to remember as a caregiver is to try to maintain a sense off familiarity with the one, we are caring for.  Here are some ways to help both of you have your best holiday season together:

• Inclusion: Wherever possible, try to include your loved one in some holiday preparations. Focus on their strengths and let them use their own capabilities to help with small tasks
• Less Is More:  When it comes to decorating and gifts, there is no need to overdo it and fill a room with presents; not only can it create a safety hazard to the one you are caring for, it can cause feelings of confusion and overwhelm your loved one.  
• Keep A Schedule: Schedule things that are meaningful and important for your loved one and you, this can help create some much needed routine in your day to day lives, and also allow for something to look forward to.
• Focus on What’s Most Meaningful: Perfection is not the goal of the holidays — meaning and joy are. We can’t control when it comes to our loved ones’ health and abilities.  Focus on producing a warm, holiday feeling and creating good memories.
• Make New Memories: Try not to focus on what you and/or your loved ones aren’t able to do this year, try doing something new. If you can’t make it to a holiday gathering, have a video chat between your loved one and other family members. Adjusting expectations will help reduce stress and provide comfort for everyone.

Self-Care for the Caregiver

As caregivers, we give and give — and during the holiday season, we feel we must give even more. However realistically we all know that overdoing it can leave you running on empty, along with bringing high stress levels to a breaking point.  When we are busy it’s easy to let self-care slip, but caregivers need to find ways to take care of themselves:

• Take Care of You:  Get plenty of sleep and enjoy the holiday treats selectively. Get outside for some mood-elevating vitamin D from sunlight or relax with some holiday-scented aromatherapy to soothe and boost your mood. Exercise can help you feel less stressed; take a ten minute walk might be just the stressbuster you need.
• Be Kind to Yourself: Many family caregivers struggle with feelings of inadequacy, and the holidays can further exacerbate this issue. Try to use the holiday season to change the way you treat yourself. Be proud of who you are and acknowledge the huge amount you do for your loved one!
• Find Support Groups: Finding a support group of your peers to talk with can also help. Who else is better to understand and relate to your feelings and struggles than those going through the same things you are? Support groups also provide insight and resources to help you manage caregiving during the holidays.  Online support group are an amazing way to connect to others just like you.
• Adjust Your Mindset: Steer your mind to the positives when you start going down a negative path; as hard as it can be this time of year, try to stay mindful and enjoy the present moment. Think about and celebrate what your loved ones can do, not what they cannot do any longer.  

I hope this can be a time for you of beginning to cultivate joy in your daily life and savour the good of this season

We offer a wonderful and supportive Caregiver support group virtually at Hopespring.  It is offered once a month.  If you would like to register and join us, please go to our website and you can register here or contact us at 519 742-4673.  We would love to welcome you!

 Be well and Take good care 

 Amy